was a horrible, HORRIBLE day! Benji had just gotten hired to work for Memphis City Schools and was leaving Tuscaloosa to start school the next day. I remember everything so well. I remember going to church, crying, going to lunch, crying, going home and loading the car, crying some more, watching Benji drive off and thinking these would be the longest three months of my life, and then falling apart in our bedroom once he was gone. I think I laid in bed for a good hour and a half after he left and just cried. It wasn’t pretty. Some people would refer to it as ugly crying 🙂 At one point, I remember my cat coming in and just staring at me…I guess because of all the racket I was making. It really was a horrible day.
(In case you didn’t already know why, we had to spend the last three months of my pregnancy apart so I could work and keep my health insurance. I’m glad we did it – having two insurances kept us from paying $1,500 out of pocket for Harper’s birth – but it was VERY hard!)
The first week that he was gone, I managed to rent our house out to someone – and she has been an excellent tenant! It was a huge stress reliever, but it left me with nowhere to live. I had planned on staying with my grandmother, but she lived about 40-45 minutes away from my office. My wonderful friends, Stephen and Susanna, ended up inviting me to come and take up residence in their guestroom. I really don’t know how I would have made it through those three months without them. Their friendship and company made everything bearable. We would watch movies (or reruns of What Not to Wear!!), play video games, cook, laugh about my cankles, sing horrible songs by Carrie Underwood and Rihanna, talk about conspiracy theories, etc. – time passed by quickly and before you knew it, Benji would be back for the weekend! I would fall apart again whenever he had to go back to Memphis and they would allow me to cry. Then they would usually take me to dinner, followed up with small group which always made me feel better! Once Monday came around, Susanna would start a countdown for Benji’s return. Seriously y’all. They were (and are) the best! Even now they have someone staying with them who lost his home in the tornado. These two are Jesus to everyone they meet. I love em’!
It’s hard to believe all that was a year ago. It was the best AND worst time of my life. There was so much anticipation for Harper’s arrival and so much regret that Benji couldn’t share those last three months with me. He lucked out though. If any of you have every slept next to a pregnant woman…you know what I mean! Tossing and turning all night, getting up to pee almost ever hour, lying awake imagining every little detail about your new baby (insomnia), etc. Who could possibly sleep next to all that? I feel sorry for dads-to-be in those last few months! It’s a tough life…one that Benji didn’t have to live. Good thing there’s always next time around! 😉
God has brought us through so much….and he’s provided EVERYTHING along the way. Whether you’re looking at last year or this year…he’s given us everything we need. Now we’re a family of three and living in beautiful Virginia. We aren’t rich by any means. At least not in terms of money. If you’re measuring love, peace, and joy though, our cups runneth over! We…are…blessed.
I’m so glad that on the anniversary of a horrible day, a day that meant separation for me and Benji, I can hold my curly-haired little boy and hug his curly-haired daddy, and just be thankful for the fact that we are together.
We serve an awesome God.